Discipline Checklist

I've been feeling the discipline slipping out of my life. I go through these peaks and valleys always, but I don't want to go to the valley this time.

I've been struggling a lot with discipline in my eating. I know that I can quickly slip into compulsive eating habits, and all the signs are there. Forgetting to eat. Not taking the time to prepare my meals the day before. Grabbing thoughtlessly for food. Late night foraging.

I will admit, the 25 pounds I have lost are a great incentive. But what I am MORE afraid of than gaining back the weight (and I am frightened of that) I am MORE afraid of going back to the place in my mind where I obsessed over every calorie, loathed myself for every bite, and let my mind be consumed with a soundtrack of self berating.

So, today I am reminding myself what I know about self-discipline.

1. Self-nurturing is an absolute priority.
   
2. A good night's sleep is critical.
   
3. Calling someone who can empathize and being utterly honest is a must.
   
4. I don't have to believe what my compulsive thoughts tell me.
   
5. The anxiety of not giving into an urge will pass.
   
6. The energy it takes to force myself to do something I don't want to do (i.e., prepare a healthy meal) is less than the energy it takes to get down on myself. Not to mention the physical energy I lack when I don't eat healthy.
   
7. Falling back into the "old ways" starts with a series of small decisions that are easily rationalized.
   
8. Turning my will and my life over to my HP means turning my THOUGHTS over to a higher way of thinking. This means I have to create new mantras.
   
9. Reaching out and helping another gets me out of myself.
   
10. That I can be restored to sanity…there is hope.