"A codependent person is one who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior." Bookmark p36
I think one of my base problems is codependency. I've thought this for a while, but had a sponsor tell me to worry about other things first. However, I feel that the "other problems" are exacerbated or even symptoms of my codependency.
I remember years ago being in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic who was a manic-depressive. For five years he controlled my life with the threat, "If you ever leave me I'll kill myself." I used the book, "Codependent No More" to get out of that relationship.
"That's that!" I thought. "I'm cured!" Hardly.
Reading one book and leaving one relationship doesn't make cure me of codependency.
I find now that I have let codependency control my work and personal life, and I can't wait to gain insight by re-reading a book that helped me so much, many years ago.
There are a few blog readers that I'm really hoping will read this book with me, and participate in my little online book club. Who knows if it will work! Nonetheless, I thought it was an idea worth a try.
Even if you're not an alcoholic and your life hasn't been affected by an alcoholic, you still may be codependent. I invite you to read some of the stories and see if you relate.
Click here to read the book and leave a comment.
Sometimes reading a book the second time around is a great thing to do and you can gain insights that you missed the first time. Plus, different types of points the author makes might speak to you more now than they did before. I've heard of that book and for those with co-dependency issues it's supposed to be a very good read.
ReplyDeleteSuch a good post.
ReplyDeletewhen i discovered co-dependency it felt like a load fell off my shoulder. a load of relief. that explained so so much about what i was feeling. but disappear? not quite. but now life's definitely more manageable, workable and i know when to stop myself from doing what i shouldn't...
ReplyDelete@Shadow - I would love to hear more about your experience with codependency. I'm gathering all the wisdom I can.
ReplyDelete@Recovery Girl - I've read the BB and 12x12 so many times, but depending on where you are in life, they means something different each time.
@Deborah...why thank you :)